Karma.

Don't jinx it.

Hello, or namaste. My name is Cassie. Or Meera nam Cassie hai. Namaste is Hindi for ‘I bow to you’ - isn't that amazing? I can also say "what time is lunch?" in Czech. I think it’s "V kolik hodin he obed?" Isn’t that cool? So now you know that I'd never go hungry in the Czech Republic. It’s not good to go hungry. I can say I love you in seven different languages. In Czech it’s "milnji te." Talking of love, wow, I love love. Love is like your best friend that you don’t see a lot. You know they’re always there but they’re just hard to get hold of. And when you do finally find them, it’s just great and you want to hug them and never let them go.

I love different countries, too. Like now I’m in Elgin. That’s in Scotland. But I could be anywhere in the world. Marrakesh or Peru. Somewhere hot where they grow chocolate. Did you know that chocolate only grows 20 degrees or less from the equator? Elgin’s nice. There’s no chocolate growing here, but the people smile a lot and say ‘hello’ and ‘how are you.’ And then you say ‘hello’ back and ‘I’m really fine. Thanks for asking.’

I like reading really big books with big words. And holding the book up to my face so that no one can see me. And then taking it down again, so that everyone can. It doesn’t happen often, but sometimes, if I’m lucky, I’ll be on the bus and I’ll be reading, and there’ll be a little boy or a little girl sitting opposite me. I can always make little children laugh. Maybe because I’m sort of like them. Then I like playing hide and seek with them - with my big book. It makes them giggle. It makes me giggle. I’d have children just to play hide and seek with them…not just that, of course. I’d like feed them and dress them up too.

I love giving to charities too. I love giving my clothes away after I’ve used them, and they’re either too small or too big or too tight or too loose. Sometimes they’re too dull. I like bright colours on clothes. Well it depends on what mood I’m in, but right about now, I like reds and pinks and yellows and oranges - colours of the heart, I guess. What I love even more is buying clothes from charity shops. I used to make up stories about the people behind the clothes. Who were they? What do they like? Who did they love? Maybe someone will do that when they pick up my clothes. Do you think they’ll work me out? A girl called Cassie, who loved a boy called….?

Ambitions: I always wished I could be a Russian Doll. A red one. With a big pair of bright blue eyes and painted on eyelashes and pink rosy cheeks. Really rosy. And my mouth would be painted on red like a bow. I’d have a flower on my chest - a rose - and two small little hands by my side. And then I could be un wrapped, two, three, four times until I was small. Really small.

Despair.

This year I decided that hats were my thing. So, today I bought a grey bowler hat and wore it with my hair tucked in. Fact is, I kinda look like a boy. Speaking of which, I realized that my outfits of late are completely monochromatic but that's okay. Colours aren't really my thing.

What good is a Starbucks without a smoking zone? Are you telling me that I can't have my coffee with cigarettes? This is war.

You're so delicate.
Skin like porcelain, sparkle and fade under the rays of the sun.
Your features, so intricately carved.
You're the most beautiful thing I've ever laid my eyes on.
Pity, your heart is empty and your soul is dead.


 

Misplaced innocence

Abstinence.